Posts Tagged ‘PTSD’

Defining ourselves!!



Do you define yourself by your losses or weakness?

Subconsciously, I certainly did for most of my life. Perfection was demanded! An impossible request.

My healing path, redefined myself as what I overcame. That felt good.

As I developed, deepened, defining myself faded, I was just present, more and more.

One day while hiking, nature and my breath (my being) merged.

I kind of floated up that hill.

On reflection, my happiest moments were void of thought, engulfed by my surroundings, vivid, sort of timeless.

On reflection, I am present, free of thought much more during the day.

Life has improved, calm, kind feelings surround me now.

I approve of Marty, all of him, finally.

You can find your path also.



Do not give power (attention) to what is in your mind!



Do not give power (attention) to what is in your mind!

Do not give power (attention) to your critics.

Do not give power (attention) to your worries.

Do not giver power (attention) to your wins or losses.

Compete where you are now.

It is all there is, give all attention to now, to what our eyes see, ears hear, nose smells etc.

It is all that exists, the rest we create, that narrative about I, me, mine is made up.

Give power to what we see, touch, smell, hear and taste!!!!!!!



Give Power to where you are.”



“Do not give Power to what is in your mind, give Power to where you are.”





My two cents:

People have this blank stare when I say “Be in the moment, right now”.

Give power to where we are, is specific and engages our senses.

See the greatness of the sky, the trees, flowers, not the thoughts in your head.

A life spent inside our head, grappling with thoughts and emotions is wasted.

What will you have to show for all your thinking.

Not much you could take with you.

Surely happiness was a constant stranger on your journey.

Place all attention on the senses, observe, be, to live fully.



The amount of time and energy devoted to healing is _____



I have observed many people with disorders of varying degrees, those with severe symptoms, suffering the most did not feel the degree of urgency needed to improve.

Even those mature adults who have suffered over 50 years, feel some urgency but are blind to comprehend what it takes to improve.

Healing or improving is not a part time endeavor.

If you have been suffering for decades, reinforcing the strength of your disorder, healing will take persistent, dedicated action.

For me, I lacked someone to direct me, so some of my efforts did not help.

Our energy level and effort can not wane from lack of improvement.

Expect setbacks and challenges along the way, keep applying effort.

Effort and attitude are crucial in this healing journey.

For most, they do not see or realize how all out effort to heal is our first priority.

Somehow other things seem more important, our Ego convinces us that healing is not that important right now.

Sitting quietly, focused, alone with our mind, scares the hell out of many who suffer.

We have to focus and get out of our mind to see the correct path, the healing journey.

It is the path less travelled. Increase your effort when resistance is the greatest.

How do you distract yourself away from depression, anxiety, PTSD, etc.?

Some overwork, some keep busy constantly, some deny, others think or talk incessantly.

Anything but sitting quietly, anything but exploring your inner world, anything but letting the noise clear for reality to emerge.

What is more important, more valuable than healing and happiness?



The Mind works best ______



The body can go supersonic, the mind works best going slow, being focused, empty of thought.

Multitasking goes beyond being fast, out there where awareness has faded.

Try slowing the body and mind at the same time.

Sit quietly, feeling gravities pull on the bottom of your feet and on your butt.

Ground yourself, gently.

Use your breath to slow the nervous system, calm respiration, blood pressure and heart rate.

Sense the minute body sensations while exploring our inner world.

Feel the body sensations caused by thoughts and emotions.

Breathe into those areas, slowly, focused and curious, observing without judgment.

Get to know your inner world, become familiar with the manifestations of thought and emotion.

They are connected and our friend, nothing to be feared, if we are familiar with them.

It is the path less traveled.



The Chains of Judgment (Thought)



My fathers narcissistic mind believed criticism was the way to build the best baseball player. He envisioned a professional baseball player (son) would bring him notoriety and status.

How could I not have a critical judgment about myself, my unworthiness. Like other abused kids, we believed we were damaged at our core. I believed I was not worthy to live during my darkest PTSD days.

Now, all those judgments have been let go, I may be flawed but unworthy has left the building.

My “Ego” felt unworthy, damaged, shamed from its earliest memory. My only touch as a child was pain and violence.

All that has changed, healing uncovered my worthiness.

We all are perfect as our true self, our bodies and “Ego” are flawed. We all age, whither and die.

I have found we all share this journey together, not in competition.

I believe abused kids grow up to repeat their abuse or be the opposite of their abuser.

We are not happy go lucky, feeling things will work out, they did not work out in our childhood.

I am the opposite of my father by choice.

Life is a journey, I now enjoy my days.



Approval versus Acceptance



We wage a daily battle for attention, sometimes from others and other times for ourselves.

The need for attention manifests in our desire for approval.

Do we need approval more than accepting ourselves is the question.

The need for approval can lead to suffering and dominate our lives.

We do things for approval that wastes our time and energy.

Approval exists out there, externally and approval can change instantly.

Those who we seek approval from can also hand out criticism.

We have little control of exterior things.

If we feel flawed, dominated by worries, tortured by doubt, approval can feel like the path to happiness.

Exterior approval or criticism has little to do with a healthy and happy existence.

Learning to discount others opinion frees us to be present and alive.



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