Posts Tagged ‘Fear’

Open, Curious and Humble

Pixabay: Pexels

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We have to be open, curious, and humble to heal or to be happy.

Being open is the initial ante to start our journey.

Exploring our inner world may uncover things that terrify us on some level.

It will take courage, coupled with daily action to navigate this healing path.

Our most guarded weaknesses will surface with an open meditative practice.

Our hidden obsessions and cravings appear without the narrative justifying their need.

Do we remain rigid, denying reality or do we accept, then surrender to them.

Bet you now which way leads to healing and happiness.

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Problems are always present

Pixabay: geralt / 20634 images

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“Nothing to Grasp” by Joan Tollifson

“I’ve discovered that there is no end to problems.

When we cure one problem, a new one emerges.

But this only becomes a source of suffering if we imagine it should or could be otherwise.

In fact, the turbulent, cloudy weather is as integral to the whole as the clear, sunny weather.

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My two cents: We must endure life’s hard times to earn the better times.

Accept the challenges life presents as part of the journey.

We are lacking nothing that prevents us from being happy.

Nothing!

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Sunday morning Insights

Pixabay: Larisa-K

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Sufferers of PTSD, depression or other disorders are generally confused and anxious.

Fear mixed with intense anxiety stops the mind from functioning properly.

We sense danger from a perceived lethal threat. We want to escape as quickly as possible, our defense mechanism has complete control.

Unfortunately, going out in public, say to a restaurant, would fire my fight or flight mechanism without my consent.

Somehow these situations linked to my abusive childhood. Our triggers seem to pick their own scenario.

Cognitively I understood no real danger existed, my defense mechanism did not agree.

Healing for me, consisted of sitting calmly, focused on my breath, as my nervous system fired violently.

My focus released the scary thoughts, then concentrated on the connected body sensations. For me, my solar plexus is where my trauma manifested inside the body.

Making friends with the bodies nervous system, intimately knowing (being with) the sensations, integrated my trauma.

Being able to build focus on the breath is body armor for the anxiety disorders.

The breath controls our nervous system and heavily influences our defense mechanism.

Navy Seals are taught to dissipate fear by extending their exhales.

Cortisol and adrenaline can be used for fuel instead of being afraid or triggered.

PTSD has access to the switch firing our fight or flight mechanism, we have final control of our nervous system.

Remember trauma is stored in the right hemisphere, inside our amygdala.

We can not access stored trauma consciously.

Meditation grants us direct access to our stored trauma.

No miracle just current neuroscience.

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How fragile is your “Ego”?

Pixabay: johnhain

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Some of our most accomplished athletes and artists have extremely fragile “Egos”.

Accomplishments, possessions, or status only hide unworthiness, shame and guilt.

Many times fear of loss, embarrassment or ridicule drives us to overachieve.

Overachievement gave my “Ego” cover, a place to hide its shame.

External possessions merely cover up that fragile “Ego” with powerful looking facades. Athletic stardom gave my “Ego” the mirage of looking confident, complete.

Unworthiness must be hidden away. We feel our “Ego” could be annihilated if our unworthiness is exposed publicly.

We live in fear of being discovered as unworthy, down to our core.

The “Ego” craves shiny objects that bring approval.

An “Ego” exposed to childhood trauma feels damaged, broken, not deserving love.

Our “Ego” did not form a healthy attachment with our first caregivers.

This unworthiness is at the core of all our suffering in later life.

This can be repaired later in life, but not without intense work.

Can you detect your “Ego” when he/she is out front?

Any strong emotion or upset summons our personal identity.

Remember we create the “Ego” for identity, not to make any decisions, and definitely not to run our life.

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Decisions: First one with PTSD

https://pixabay.com/users/JenDigitalArt-6490932/

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Trauma has impacted our life negatively. After the initial period of discovering what PTSD is and how to improve, we make an important decision.

We were all victims at one time or we would not have PTSD. Now, we must decide, do we continue behaving as a victim or do we take responsibility and try to heal?

If we consult the statistics on suicides and the epidemic nature of PTSD in the world, many decide to stay a victims.

I have witnessed over and over how PTSD destroys peoples lives. PTSD gets worse with time and behaving as a victim, empowers it.

The decision is simple, take responsibility or live a victims existence.

No healing or happiness is experienced as a victim.

It seems an easy decision, common sense, but PTSD is an irrational disorder, ruled by extreme fear and distortion.

The decision is much easier if we develop a few skills to help us heal.

It is the road less traveled.

It takes incredible courage, then a willpower to take action in the face of fear.

It takes concrete baby steps repeated over and over.

We can decide to fight for our freedom at anytime.

Somehow, we must focus, clear the fog of PTSD, to see our suffering is caused by our own behavior.

We have to take risks to heal.

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5 Ways Anger is Not Like Other Emotions By Jonice Webb PhD ~

Tumisu / 619 images

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“Anger is not just any old emotion. It’s special.

In fact, it’s so special that a 2017 survey by the Mental Health Foundation of 2000 people found that 28% are sometimes worried about the level of anger that they feel.

First, let’s outline what makes anger different from other emotions, and then we’ll talk about how you can use this information to become happier and healthier in your life.

5 Ways Anger is Special

 

* It’s Motivating: Anger’s purpose is to push you to protect yourself. Anger gives you energy. It’s activating, and it drives you to engage, not withdraw, as most other emotions do.

 

* It Never Stands Alone: Anger is always a result of feeling something else. You feel hurt, marginalized, overlooked, targeted, mistreated or vulnerable. Anger isn’t just an emotion, it’s a constellation of emotions. There are always layers of feelings underneath it, feeding it.

 

* It Seeks a Target: Other emotions can simply be. Anger cannot. Like an arrow shot from the bow, it looks for a target. This is what makes anger so easy to misdirect. It may erupt at the wrong person, in the wrong way and at the wrong time so very easily.

 

* It Can Be Turned Inward or Outward: Sometimes directing our anger at its true target can be acutely uncomfortable, and sometimes we aren’t aware of the true target. This is when we are at risk for turning our anger inward, directing it at ourselves.

 

* It’s Capable of Damaging Your Health: Research has shown that anger prone individuals and people who express their anger as rage are more at risk for heart attacks and cancer.

Anger is a powerful, protective, complex emotion.

Yes, it has potential to do great damage.

But used properly, it also has potential to help you mightily.“
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Never give up, Never give in, We control only Attitude and Effort!n

Pixabay: geralt

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Growing up in the violence of a critical narcissistic father, my self worth was heavily damaged.

There was no escape, my abuser was a giant, I was helpless, I was a thing to him. He wanted to own me, control me, use me for his gratification as a star athlete.

My father coveted my being, my soul, to fill the void in his life. As a child, I imagined this was how everyone was raised.

You would think this was a life sentence of suffering for that little boy, but you would be wrong. I always knew something was wrong, that immense unworthy feeling never left my side.

My trauma lay dormant until a crisis in my life at age 58, then all hell broke loose.

Finally a therapist diagnosed me with C-PTSD.

I had an opponent, an antagonist to face, an opportunity to heal had arrived.

The ghost that haunted my life came into the light.

Fear had a name, PTSD.

PTSD became my opponent.

Just like the jock I am, a plan of attack was charted and intense daily action was taken.

Being able to let the long term goals alone, allowed me to enter the process more freely.

Attitude and Effort is what I brought everyday to my healing.

I was retired, so healing became my full time job.

Five hours of meditating, couple hours of reading, one hour of aerobic exercise, and constant application filled each day.

I was a professional athlete, so using my strengths seemed logical.

Use your strengths and modify any therapy to fit you.

Never give up, never give in, we control our attitude and effort.

Be positive, be inspired to give all our effort.

Relax, enjoy life, smile, you have done your best.

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