Posts Tagged ‘C-PTSD’

Words do not impact PTSD

scholty1970 / 996 images

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I used to ruminate on my triggers, my unworthiness.

It was a wrestling match, my goal was to find a cognitive way out.

The unfortunate reality of PTSD, confusion, panic, escaping and fear make thinking clearly impossible.

Trying to think my way out of PTSD increased its power, duration and impact.

Agoraphobic was my final destination before I gave up thinking my way out.

If spoken words could heal PTSD, suffering in the world would drastically subside.

That trauma is not stored on the cognitive hemisphere of the brain.

Words have no impact on PTSD,

Try saying words when a triggers erupts violently, feeling a mortal danger is imminent.

Words never calmed my triggers.

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Thinking: What we know

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From “The Method: 5 Inquiry Steps to Enlightenment”

Everything you *think* you know is second-hand knowledge.

Everything you know without thinking is what you *actually* know.

See for yourself right now.

Become quiet for a moment; when your thoughts finally dissolve into silence, notice what knowledge remains when thinking isn’t happening.

What do you still know with absolute certainty?

Eventually, you’ll see that awareness of consciousness is the only knowledge that survives this inquiry.

This is your primary knowledge.

Navigating the world for practical reasons can require a great deal of second-hand knowledge.

To maintain your sense of self and the imagined world that this self inhabits, second-hand knowledge is critical.

While you need second-hand knowledge to navigate the world for practical reasons, you don’t actually need it to maintain yourself.

Maintenance is only needed if something can stop working.

Who you really are can’t stop working because it doesn’t ‘work’ in the first place… it simply IS.

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Problems

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Everyone seems to agree with this quote.

What do we do when that negative person is looking back at us in the mirror?

I was my worst enemy, my worst critic wrapped up inside my own body.

No accomplishment, nothing I could attain or earn ever changed that prison.

Change happened internally.

Negative feelings and thoughts were released, let go, fading into space.

The mind holds on to old habits fiercely, so daily practice is needed.

Let go of a negative thought about yourself everyday.

Self soothe, immerse yourself in a blanket of kindness

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The Science of Self-Talk: Rumination

johnhain / 1133 images

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It’s important to note here that negative emotion (or negative affect) is not necessarily your enemy. It’s how you think about negative emotions that makes them negative.

In other words, how you represent negative emotions to yourself in your own self-talk is the key ingredient that turns them into real negativity. How so?

Researchers studying depression have figured out that people with clinical depression have a kind of compulsive destructive self-talk.

Psychologists call it rumination, and its characteristic is repetitively going over symptoms of distress, like a scab you keep obsessively picking at.

Its other characteristic is passivity. You don’t focus on solutions but problems.

So you have a negative emotion, such as sadness, but, on top of that sadness, you’re telling yourself this toxic story:

It’s all useless, I can’t do anything right. I’ve been stuck in this same position forever and I’ll never get out of it.

Dysfunctional self-talk tells a story. It’s the wrong kind of story, a story in which you’re passive and helpless.

In constructive self-talk, on the other hand, you see yourself as someone who can achieve your goals. That doesn’t just lift your mood.

It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you see yourself as capable, then you have the right perspective to become capable.

That puts you in the driver’s seat.

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My two cents: Self talk: “Edward Bourne PhD. Anxiety specialist: “It is so automatic and subtle you don’t notice it or the effect it has on your moods and feelings. It appears in telegraphic form- one short word or image (”Oh no!) contains a whole series of thoughts, memories, or associations. Anxious.18th self-talk is typically irrational but almost always sounds like the truth.
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Let’s talk Victimhood

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This is an extremely volatile word on any PTSD discussion board. Many PTSD sufferers lose their minds, becoming irate and aggressive.

The discussion board taught me Victimhood demands congruence.

My sin was writing, we can heal with daily work.

You find out how hateful people can behave, being anonymous on a discussion board.

Victims could not stand having a non-victim in their midst.

The great divide between these victims and myself, was responsibility.

One communal thought shared, we can not heal from Complex PTSD until the DSM recognizes it as a disorder.

Unbelievable how many excuses are created to avoid taking responsibility.

Fear dominates their lives.

Yes my father abused me violently, but I am responsible, now.

When I was blaming my father, being a victim, I suffered.

I maybe be a victim in the future, but it will not be for long.

Please have the courage to take responsibility for your life, take action.

Taking a positive action (step) to heal, however small, is a giant step out of Victimhood.

I maybe damaged physically and emotionally, riddled with flaws, but unworthiness has no foothold inside me.

This sounds arrogant writing, but I refuse to be or act like a victim.

When I catch myself feeling sorry for myself in a weak moment, it disgusts me.

I would rather die taking responsibility, whatever that entails, than live feeling sorry for myself.

We die the same day, same hour, same minute, if you suffer as a victim or live free and risk.

We have a choice.

This may generate a few responses.

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Mindfulness: Benefits I have experienced: Part One, 1

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The first breakthrough was dropping the victim attitude and lifestyle. Taking actions, strenuous aerobic exercise, meditating five hours a day, research and reading of ways to improve, and finally mindful application filled my day with positive effort.

Before I found meditation, my blame was aimed directly at my father. Hate, resentment and rage filled my life.

After finding mindfulness, my perception changed. Letting blame go brought total responsibility to my doorstep.

Until we take responsibility for our life, healing is impossible.

Benefit two: Depression has not visited me in many years.

Mindfulness taught me to let go of the Ego’s needy thoughts. When melancholy grips me at supposed low moments, my practice takes over.

Meditating has built my focus and ability to take a step back, observing the thoughts from a distance.

As always the culprit is my adolescent “Ego” bombarding me with needy thoughts of me lacking something or someone wronging me.

By letting these thoughts fade, then focusing on my senses, calm enters my being. My breath can dissipate cortisol and adrenaline as it energizes my parasympathetic nervous system, the brakes.

That melancholy mood withers without attention.

Where we place our attention has the greatest impact on our life!

Anyone have a different most powerful skill?

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The other side of Criticism

Pixabay: geralt

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Are you a critical person?

Do you criticize your spouse?

Do you criticize your kids.

Do you realize the impact on them?

Do you realize the impact on you?

Do you know there is another choice?

Kindness.

I believe we have a responsibility to be kind, gracious, and helpful to others.

What is the inner critic saying, feeling when you criticize?

Why do you need to criticize?

Does your “Ego” need to feel superior at all costs?

Impossible to be happy with a heart who needs to be mean to others.

The “Ego” brings forth many destructive thoughts to our doorstep.

Are you aware of the destructive (negative) thoughts the “Ego” generates.

Free yourself from thought, give up criticizing.

Criticizing others damages us.

Gratitude, giving and kindness are alternative ways to live and be happy.

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