Posts Tagged ‘C-PTSD’

Doing the daily work

JEROME FAVRE/EPA/SHUTTERSTOCK

This collection of William Shakespeare’s plays is widely considered one of the most significant treasures in literary history. Formally titled “Mr. William Shakespeare’s Comedies, Histories & Tragedies,” the folio contains all but four of the Bard’s dramatic works. Of the 750 copies originally published seven years after his death in 1623, only 228 remain. Paul Allen, the co-founder of Microsoft, snatched one up at Christie’s, an auction house in New York City, in 2001. It cost him a cool $6.2 million.

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Meditation/Mundfulness is not an intellectual property, take a class or read a book and you only gain a cognitive perspective.

I could read every book about hitting a baseball ever written, an expert of sorts. Does not mean I could ever hit a big league fastball.

Meditation/Mindfulness is an action practice, you have to sit quietly, focused, observing your demons.

Reading a book or taking a class will not touch that experience.

The more you sit, building your focus through daily practice, the more you benefit.

Simple.

Better to take 30 minutes of daily action than read 1,000 books.

Takes action to change, to heal, to earn our fredom.

Takes courage to resist, to stand up, to finally take action.

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My childhood was extremely violent: life was a battleground

From https://www.corpun.com/car1.htm

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Today I felt that old familiar total helplessness. Cortisol and adrenaline released in small quantities, but that feeling a huge man was about to beat my ass violently, gripped me.

The level of violence my dad perpetrated on me was intense. A specially made paddle with holes was hand made at the cabinet shop.

He was proud of his creation, he was a narcissist, I was his pawn.

Once a week at dinner, Lima beans were served. When my gag reflex would not let me ingest them, I puked, then got beat until he got tired.

Once a week.

Imagine if I did something wrong, his level of violence and rage escalated. Emotionally, constant criticism was his preferred vehicle of conversation.

After all my healing, all my meditating and practice, that demon still lives in my nervous system.

Childhood trauma leaves scars, some last the rest of our life.

My choice is obvious, avoid and isolate or accept, let go and be present.

It is always a simple solution to yesterday’s problems.

External stimulus either controls our mind or we focus and direct our attention to this moment.

My practice has not eliminated the damage but made it possible to enjoy life and experience happiness.

At every breath we have a choice, give in to judgment or stay present, focused and alive.

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We should train our soldiers, PTSD WOULD DECLINE

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Matthew Ricard from “Happiness”

After the Chinese invasion of Tibet in 1959, Tenzin Choedrak, the personal physician of the Dalai Lama, was first sent to a forced labor camp in northeastern Tibet along with some one hundred others.

Five prisoners, himself among them, survived.

He was transferred from camp to camp for nearly twenty years and often thought that he would die of hunger or of the abuse inflicted on him.

A psychiatrist who specializes in post-traumatic stress and who treated Doctor Choedrak was astonished that he showed not the least sign of post-traumatic stress syndrome.

He was not bitter, felt no resentment, displayed serene kindness, and had none of the usual psychological problems, such as anxiety, nightmares, and so on.

Choedrak acknowledged that he occasionally felt hatred for his torturers, but that he always returned to the practice of meditation on inner peace and compassion.

That was what sustained his desire to go on living and ultimately saved him.

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My two cent: Suicide is extremely rare or non existent for these world class meditators.

Amazing what we can endure if we let our judgments go, then stay present.

Inner peace and compassion sustained this monk for twenty years.

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Would you tell your story? “There are no Others” by Kyle Hoobin

Pixabay: Bessi

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Remember: Misery doesn’t just love company, it need something it.

You would not be able to struggle (well, at least not very easily) if you realized that there was nobody there to complain to about it.

If there was nobody there to hear your story, would you still tell it?

Struggle makes absolutely no sense if it’s just you.

If it’s just you, then struggling with something becomes impractical, non-productive.

If it’s just you, struggle is pointless.

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My two cents: Seems everyone has a story, some have a narrative explaining their victimhood.

Childhood trauma impacts adulthood, usually we remain a victim, mirror our abusers behavior or become the opposite.

Can we be happy without a storyline?

Can we just be?

Abuse happened to me, it definitely is not who I am!

Happy or sad, I refuse to feel sorry for myself, make excuses or be a victim.

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The Breathing Track: Secrets I think? –Updated!!!! Comments

Alex hogs the show.  We have both been working everyday, amazed at where this is taking us.  Alex, at 70 has changed drastically.  He was a perfectionist, rigid, clinging to thinking and fighting to be able to control life.

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He used to worry, thinking about all the ways to please others, so many obligations, no time left for him.  Searching for the self-worth, that a child has hidden away from his constant search, he was lost.  Now, he has gained flexibility, a curiosity for the unknown and the focus to let go.

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Practice, so you can let go too.

We have a Choice!!!!!!!!

Pixabay: geralt

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Personally, life seemed to unfold much to quick, being abused dominated my existence.

My world was hyper critical, unworthiness permeated my thoughts, my being, my soul.

Always feeling not good enough, damaged my self worth.

My mind would be my worst enemy for 58 years, carrying those early judgments as gospel.

Most of our issues connect with the judgments we grasp.

The thoughts we entertain create our reality.

If I still believed I was flawed at my core, life would be miserable.

How can gratitude and giving thrive in my life?

In this moment right now, my opportunity is as great as anyone on this earth.

Not better, no worse, unlimited like you and me.

It is a choice to let the past go.

A choice to be present, focused and positive.

The choice to take action everyday changes us.

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The Complex Mind can handle simple commands

Pixabay

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Rick Hanson in “Buddha’s Brain” shares this: “The number of possible combinations of 100 billion neurons firing or not is approximately 10 to the millionth power, or 1 followed by a million zeros, in principle; this is the number of possible states of your brain.”

Extremely complex with incredible chances for opportunity.

Why would we choose negative stimuli to focus on?

We have a choice.

This morning we could only entertain positive, hopeful and soothing thoughts.

Hanson says:

“It’s so busy that, even though it’s only 2 percent of the body’s weight, it uses 20–25 percent of its oxygen and glucose.”

Choose optimism, a bounty of gratitude and kindness.

Choose to be present, in harmony with the earth and others.

Let being special or selfish alone.

Just be an observer for a while, letting the one who judges rest for a long while.

Can you give up judgments today?

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