Posts Tagged ‘Attitude’

How do we Practice?


If we examine two concert pianists, two professional athletes, or two people attempting a new skill, how do their practice habits impact their performance?


The obvious habits of dedication, hard work and discipline influence performance in a major way.


Another area we may overlook is the ability to make mistakes, think outside the box.
Trying new things brings a vulnerable, awkward feeling. We desire to be accomplished, proficient and confident. Making mistakes does not feel like that.



Growth, improvement and satisfaction are the rewards for our risking.
We fear embarrassment and that feeling limits our growth.


I worked with a concert pianist a few years back. He tried to be perfect not only during a performance but during practice.

It limited his growth and stole his enjoyment of playing.

With daily focus and acceptance, he agreed that a half hour a day, he would tolerate mistakes.



I suggested he start playing from the middle of a piece and practice a short part of the composition. This was a moment of freedom for him, a big weight removed.
Now, he could enjoy himself, rather than be responsible for pleasing the composer, his teacher and the audience.


I challenged him to speed up, go fast and accept stumbling now, to be more proficient later.


There was no room for his needs or enjoyment with perfection as a goal.


The next day it was like he found a whole new area of opportunity. He could relax and just play for the first time.


If we can not allow ourselves to make mistakes, we limit our ceiling of growth (my opinion).

Even Carl Jung knows the journey is difficult



“The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely”.

 – Carl Jung




 This terrifying thing is part of our journey to wellbeing, our stated affirmation.




 In this moment, right now, I approve of myself.




 Do no harm means giving up unworthiness, guilt and shame.




Mindful Wisdom

Never give depression, anxiety or unworthiness attention, power.

That means we stay present, positive, grateful and active.


We do not write poems or posts describing how powerful, how pervasive or how much of a victim we feel like!


If I am feeling depressed, wisdom tells me, my thoughts suck right now.


I am not aware of right now, I am lost in judgment and emotion.


Living an active, healthy existence takes vigilance and discipline.


It takes courage to stay present and take action.


It takes courage to let go of that helpless, hopeless feeling.


Focus on what we have, not what we lack or desire.


Change things up and find someone to donate a smile, an ear, or a helping hand.


Attitude changes with emptying the mind of the noise.

Mindfulness is a natural painkiller by Alexandra Thompson




Mindfulness is just as effective as go-to cognitive behavioural therapy

Both help improve ‘physical functioning’ and reduce the risk of depression

Mindfulness is a natural painkiller, research suggests.

A study found the trendy meditation – favoured by the likes of Hollywood’s resident ‘health guru’ Gwyneth Paltrow and pop sensation Katy Perry – is just as effective at easing discomfort as the go-to treatment cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT).

Focusing the mind on the present moment is thought to help sufferers cope with their discomfort, which also improves their ‘physical functioning’ and reduces their risk of depression.

The research was carried out by The Ottawa Hospital in Ontario, and led by the biostatistician Dr Wei Cheng.

Writing in the journal Evidence Based Mental Health, the scientists said: ‘While CBT is considered to be the preferred psychological intervention of 

‘Although a number of recommendations have been proposed to improve CBT for patients with chronic pain, an additional solution may be to offer patients mindfulness based stress reduction.

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Upon awakening this morning, I felt overwhelmed, anxious, and vulnerable.

Following these feelings and emotions backward, worry, doubt and fear were present.

These judgments projected danger for me. Complex PTSD highlights dangers that it creates.

My mind seemed confused, wanting to avoid or eliminate my predicament.


You could label this catastrophizing, predicting gloom and doom. It stems from my abuse, my critical upbringing. Never safe, never calm.

What can we do?


A couple deep breaths, intently focusing on this moment, cleared this cognitive mess.


I am fine taking this breath, collecting data from all my senses intently.


Awareness returns to this moment.


Reminding myself, life is not lived predicting anything in the future. 


Remember, happiness visits only one time zone, now.


You can not be happy in the past or future.


My healing has not eliminated these overwhelming thoughts,  but I do have tools to handle these fears.

Fear of failure or the thrill of Victory

Having grown up with a narcissistic caregiver, the fear of failure motivated me.
Actually the fear of failing my father’s demands would be more accurate.


Many of the greatest athletes ever were driven by fear of failure.
Success and stardom never diminished that insecurity.


Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig are perfect examples. One was bombastic, gregarious and happy-go-lucky. The other was shy, boring and very quiet.

One demanded the limelight, lived an excessive life of pleasure with food, alcohol and women.


The other had no apparent excess or vices,  playing like a man with average talent. Gehrig was called the iron horse, playing in over 2,000 straight games.  An incredible record that was finally broken by Cal Ripken.


One was incorrigible, his parents dropped the Babe off at a catholic orphanage. The other graduated from Columbia university.


Babe Ruth was questioned about making more money than the president. He commented he had a better year than the president. Lou Gehrig was a superstar but never felt worthy of that title.


A mindful athlete enjoys being in the moment, knowing his self-worth is not connected to external wins and losses.  Not an easy path for most mortals.

the journey to discover your true nature,

The gift of learning to meditate is the greatest gift you can give yourself in this life.


For it is only through meditation that you can undertake the journey to discover your true nature, and so find the stability and confidence you will need to live, and die, well.


Meditation is the road to enlightenment …


Quietly sitting,

body still,

speech silent,

mind at peace,

let your thoughts and emotions,

whatever arises,

come and go,

without clinging to anything.


– Sogyal Rinpoche

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