The CONTRAST before and after HEALING !!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

https://pixabay.com/users/maria-anne-595075/

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Severe childhood abuse impacted how my mind wired together, besides filling my amygdala with trauma laced implicit memories.

Even after healing, remnants exist in the recesses of my mind.

Before I healed, suffering was compounded by thoughts that were endless, intrusive and completely unworthy in nature.

Severely abused kids carry the damage not only in the mind but throughout our bodies.

Hard to describe an upside down nervous system erupting double digit times everyday.

Healing was long, arduous and painful for me.

The contrast before and after healing, Startling.

Just the elimination of intrusive thoughts seemed Euphoric.

The absence of suffering can be considered Exhilarating on its own.

The cessation of never feeling good enough Ecstatic.

This concept like PTSD can not be described by words but experienced in real life.

Beyond the euphoric and ecstatic, the ability to let the noise go and enter this moment unencumbered by unworthy thought, seems miraculous at first.

Yes, I came back to earth after a while.

Learning to accept and not question or resent my childhood abuse was not easy.

Moving forward, my childhood still can be awakened and unleashed.

This lives a short existence now, but I admit, yearning for happy go lucky moments, still overtakes my desires.

I guess we all wish for things we will never experience.

That desire is not a need and fades as quickly as unwanted thought, now.

Moral of the story: Never give up, never give in, fight for your wellbeing.

It is the journey we need to improve, not the destination.

The destination is always death, so enjoy the ride as much as possible.

That does not mean chasing pleasure but have enormous gratitude and be a world class giver for a start.

Have a good journey today.

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5 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by rudid96 on February 25, 2020 at 3:20 pm

    This morning, right now in this moment, my laser guide sentences:

    “It is the journey we need to improve, not the destination.
    The destination is always death, so enjoy the ride as much as possible.”

    The HOW of this msg?
    “………..have enormous gratitude and be a world class giver for a start.”

    Later, when my PTSD cries again “but WHY?” my adult self responds lovingly…

    “to Have a good journey today”

  2. I walk the same path

    It is how we direct our attention

    How we act to enjoy our wellbeing

    It is a journey

    We die same day same hour whether we worry our ass off or live free taking risk

    Your responses make my investment in this blog worthwhile

    Rather have one person doing the work following me than a 1000 likes

  3. Posted by rudid96 on February 25, 2020 at 3:36 pm

    These blogs have become my lifeline and my life “preserver.” 1000 Likes don’t have the ripple effect of saving a single life. My path to healing began and continues to hold fast to these blog posts. They’re my cairns, my corner stones, my ledges to grab hold when I’m falling fast, and my place to sit and just rest.

  4. Thanks for the gratitude

    We can heal in our own with daily action or improve alot

  5. Love, Love, Love. Thank you!

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