Yes I have asked “Why am I so much different?

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Why can I do extremely difficult tasks but find simple things that others do with ease, extremely awkward and sometimes painful.

I have healed once, been back in the throes of PTSD, and eventually found my way out again.

After all this, my triggers do not fire my fight or flight mechanism but unworthy thoughts still exist in the farthest reaches of my mind.

Focused and centered, I enter into scary trigger situations before I surrender to avoidance and fear.

I refuse to let trauma fear dictate my behavior.

Call it hard headed, or my dad would win or anything you like, I battle my trauma for control of my life.

It is a challenge I freely accept in its entirety.

Take calculated risks with PTSD, the triggers are a mirage.

Go towards your triggers, get comfortable in awkward situations, test yourself, grow, risk, be alive.

Die battling rather than give up.

Attitude and effort are under our control.

Live a good life, die a good death, refuse to suffer as a victim!

We have all the courage we need!

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4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Kyrie Lizik on August 11, 2019 at 3:35 am

    Thank you Marty

  2. Your welcome

    Life is not easy for us but we can enjoy it

  3. Exactly! We should refuse to suffer a victim, we are survivors and we’ve gt what it takes to survive. We just have to come to that realization and grow with that life brings our way

  4. Thanks for your insight.

    For me, when my PTSD symptoms are out, life becomes a battle.

    My mind seems hijacked, it feels more confused, it wants to find an answer, a solution to make things safe. My mind works differently, well a trauma activated mind can be in a fight or flight stage. It senses fear where fear does not exist. Actually it is a mirage we live.

    I refuse to isolate to much, refuse to avoid but some of those outings are not that enjoyable.

    I do not feel easy going and carefree, the trauma danger I am in the midst of makes me uncomfortable.

    My mind wants to judge, to label but I refuse to play the game.

    It is rewarding to travel into the belly of my PTSD fear surrounded by the blanket of kindness covering me.

    Avoidance will make healing impossible.

    Healing takes courage when trauma unloads in us

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