Responsibility

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In the beginning of my healing journey, I blamed my father for his constant abuse toward me.

Yes, he was a violent narcissist but my blame only harmed me.

I would read you must forgive your abuser to heal.

I struggled with forgiveness and languished in my blame and guilt.

Eventually a solution arrived.

I would let my father be responsible for his life and I would be responsible for mine.

He was raised in a family of 16 and was a narcissist, maybe he did the best he could.

My new found responsibility opened the door to healing.

However you get there, take responsibility for your life.

Blame led to more suffering for me.

Blame made me a victim, responsibility removed that burden.

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2 responses to this post.

  1. Very interesting and timely post for me, Marty.

    At 56 years old, tomorrow in fact, I am visiting my mother 400 miles away from me, she is 89 years old, and my plan is to have a sit-down with her and come up with some “completion,” or resolution if you will.

    I have been struggling with the approach. But this reminds me it’s not about blaming her for her inadequacy, it’s about letting her know that I turned out great in spite of everything, and that I take full responsibility for my life’s journey.

    I think that will lead to a very open approach with her, and most likely will inspire her to be open in talking to me about her life and the way it went.

    Thank you so much! Mick

    On Wed, Aug 7, 2019, 10:55 AM C PTSD – A Way Out wrote:

    > Marty posted: ” . . In the beginning of my healing journey, I blamed my > father for his constant abuse toward me. Yes, he was a violent narcissist > but my blame only harmed me. I would read you must forgive your abuser to > heal. I struggled with forgi” >

  2. Good luck Mick

    I think you will feel much better with the results

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