Beyond Mindfulness: the direct approach to lasting peace , happiness and love: Stephen Bodian

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For example, you may take great pride in your accomplishments—the difficulties you’ve overcome, the relationships you’ve cultivated, the places you’ve visited, the money you’ve made.

But the memories of even the best past experiences can crowd your mind and prevent you from being fully present right now and appreciating the joy and fulfillment that this irreplaceable moment potentially affords.

Or you may find yourself gravitating back with sadness and shame to your failures, your lost opportunities, your mistakes, the people you’ve hurt, the traumas you’ve suffered.

But this haze of negative thoughts and feelings keeps you from having more positive experiences now that might help alleviate your pain.

Or you may keep recycling the story of how you’ve been wronged, abandoned, or overlooked by others, and your resentment has embittered you and cut you off from the love that’s available to you now.

You may suffer because you compare your present experiences unfavorably with those you’ve had in the past or live in constant fear that the same traumas and disappointment that befell you before will happen again.

And your relationships are never really fulfilling because they’re clouded by judgments, expectations, projections, and the shadow of previous heartache and loss.

Wandering endlessly in the story of your life, you suffer because you’ve separated yourself from, and can’t genuinely connect with, life as it is.

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