Surrender: a great tool for healing, wellbeing (Happiness)

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Healing was incremental for me, each plateau reached through concerted action over months. Nothing came easy or quick.


Complex PTSD from a childhood does not heal miraculously, quickly or easily. The mind was not fully developed when trauma entered its world. Hard to tell what is normal and what is the aftermath of abuse.


Aerobic exercise, therapy, reading, meditating, practicing acceptance, applying mindfulness and persistence each brought benefits for me. Sometimes all hope seemed lost but something inside refused to give up.


This trait is very important. Lots of setbacks, even perceived losses on this journey. That inner guide can be our savior in our low moments.


Meditating and mindfulness carved out a small secure space for me to survive. This space grew incrementally as I healed.


It was like climbing a ladder, each successive rung revealed more of the horizon, more of the path.


Acceptance was difficult, releasing the shame and guilt reached a sticking point. My fear, worry and confusion kept me paralyzed for months.


I still had resistance, actually I was terrified, enforced with cortisol by my fight or flight mechanism exploding. The drugs are real, the storyline is the mirage.


Being vulnerable, that is surrendering completely in the face of my trauma, broke the traffic jam. It was scary not to resist, to be so vulnerable, so defenseless.


With arms outstretched, totally open, I pictured my heart as a butterfly net.


I had found the next step, being vulnerable, surrendering to my fears.

 

This exposed my fears so I could observe them.


Try surrendering the next time you meditate.
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7 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Laurie Schuler on April 2, 2019 at 4:39 pm

    Very Powerful!!

  2. Counter intuitive
    Strength or more control is gained not through power but surrender

    Being vulnerable

  3. Posted by rudid96 on April 2, 2019 at 6:04 pm

    Thank you for your posts. So often I find they’re so right now, I’m in some part of this process at the moment. Complete surrender is too scary a thought but in tiny steps it I’m body is willing to test it’s limits. Crazy as it may seem, people walking behind me can send me into a tailspin. I’ve finally gotten up the courage to ask my therapist to help me practice so I can travel. One step forward Yah?

  4. Thank you for your gratitude. In the middle of healing, we do not know where the goal posts are located.

    I would work hard and process the trauma currently running. There would be a brief pause of a couple of days as a new piece of my childhood abuse arrived.

    I learned that my meditation practice, my ability to focus and let go could protect me.

    Anxiety, panic and fear can be gobbled up using the breath.

    Ridid96, congratulations

    Your actions and courage have helped you survive and fight. Give yourself a kindness bath and smile

    People staring at me summoned that shamed child into panic. My adult body was no match for my complex ptsd

    Take risks like asking for help traveling. We do not have to win to heal or be happy, we only need to live fully with a good attitude.

  5. Funny how things arrive in my consciousness now.

    Try surrender on minor things first.

    Maybe pick someone whose behavior adjectives us a little. Surrender to the negative thoughts, judgments and emotions that surface.

    Maybe waiting in traffic or in a line at the bank.

    Explore how your inner world reacts to people or situations.

    For me being an 67 year old male, seeing young adults with rainbow hair, piercings and tattoos brings my judgment machine out of hiding.

    It takes practice to let my judgment go.

  6. Posted by fibrolighthouse on April 5, 2019 at 4:02 pm

    Releasing shame- that’s a tough one! ♥️

  7. Yes releasing shame is difficult. You start by building your focus then releasing judgments and thought.

    Next we can work on guilt. Then shame can be dealt with

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