Updated: A visual, maybe it will speak to you….

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Looking back on my healing journey, an image pops up, me with a shovel digging, digging and digging a little everyday, shoveling the crap, my childhood abuse, and my judgment about that abuse.
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The hole left from my daily excavations, became the platform for launching my mindfulness journey, traveling to the other side of my mind.
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Surprisingly, I found peace, calm, perfect self image, a total absence of judgment, words or dialogue, a parallel universe of joyful awareness.
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Trauma faded in there, the ego took flight and what was left, an expansive, brilliant space.
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Life came alive without doubt, worry, guilt and unworthiness, it was the space created from letting go of all that shit, built up over a 60 year span, that brought the chance for happiness to my doorstep.
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Nothing happened fast for me, nothing spectacular transpired, my meditation was not blessed with brilliant, vivd light shows like others around me, and that was fine with my jock mentality.
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I had learned early to accept challenges, develop a plan, take action, and then compete with every ounce of energy, this habit had saved me time again.
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Jocks, especially jocks without great talent, who still compete with greater skilled athletes, have a discipline, a time where things change, the cognitive, the doubt, the need to think about things fade, it is game time for an overachiever.
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Competition at a professional level is as present an endeavor as I have ever experienced, that and a triple rollover in a car on an interstate.
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All is up for grabs in this moment, a large crowd has paid to witness this current sporting event, a winner will be crowned, he who blinks and lets thought enter his performance loses.
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As I look back on my baseball career, it becomes evident that the skills developed competing, are the gems for me now, not wins, losses, hits or thrills.
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Assess your skills, then use your strengths for healing, adapt therapy to your strengths.
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Good healing, never give up, never give in, there is plenty of healing in that space, right there, a willpower that crushes thought.
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One response to this post.

  1. Posted by jennifertemp on May 10, 2014 at 6:38 pm

    Whoever said “a picture is worth a thousand words” is right on here. Says it all.

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