What is implicit memory? “Mindfulness Skills workbook for clients and clinicians”. Debra Burdick,

 

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What is implicit memory?

•  Encoded throughout our lives. •  Probably the only type of memory infants have. •  Allows us to remember how to do something without being conscious of how to do it, such as riding a bicycle, walking—anything procedural.

•  Gets stored without our conscious awareness.

•  Gets retrieved without our awareness—“I don’t know I’m having a memory.”

•  Past memories come flooding in without knowing they’re from the past; it feels like it is all coming from the present.

•  Drives behavior without our awareness—often negatively.

•  Primes us to respond in a certain fashion.

•  Readies us for the future.

•  Designed to protect us.

•  Can create here and now perceptions and beliefs that are actually from the past.

•  Can show up as a physical feeling in our body, an emotional reaction, a behavioral pattern, or a bias.

•  The amygdala is responsible for implicit memory as it scans earlier memories of danger.

•  Procedural memory is a subset (how to do things).

 

 

Why do we care?

 

 

•  Implicit memories can emotionally hijack our prefrontal cortex and drive behavior without our awareness.


•  Can often create a total misinterpretation of a current situation.

 

•  Implicit memory is like the child that lives within us.


•  Implicit memories may show up in body sensations.


•  Mindfulness allows us to integrate implicit with explicit memory to improve emotional response and behavioral patterns.
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Deep Secrets and Inner Child Healing

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Diana Raab

Excerpt:

“When putting the finishing touches on my most recent book, Writing for Bliss, I decided to include a section on inner-child healing. 

 

It wasn’t in my original draft, but I noticed that many friends and colleagues inquired about it, reminding me how healing and transformative it would be to write about and access the wounded child.

 

Around the same time, I’d just read Thich Nhat Hanh’s book Reconciliation, where the wise Buddhist said that inside each of us is a young, suffering child; and that to protect ourselves from future suffering, we all try to forget the pain. 

 

Most often, when we feel pain from a deep place within, it’s our inner wounded child who’s calling. Forgetting the pain results in more pain.

 

Writing about this pain can be one way to heal our inner child and help heal any negative emotions we might be holding on to. 

 

Research has shown that the body holds both emotional and physical pain, and even if we try to ignore that pain and forge ahead with our lives, chances are that it will always be there. 

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My “Ego” is Stealthy, Adolescent and Manipulative!

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Awareness brings my manipulative “Ego” into focus. I believe some of this is hard-wired from my abusive, critical, and violent childhood. My “Ego” has never felt equal to another “Ego” (yours either).

 

The need for approval, for being appreciated, runs deep in my unworthy inner child. That critic, that resentful little voice, tears at my wellbeing.

 

Take this blog,:  I have to admit, I want relevance, approval for my knowledge, my blog.   Yes, having a 100,000 avid followers would stroke my “ego” and brings a feeling of relevance.   I see this as shallow and impermanent but it has power at times.

 

 

Does having more followers equal happiness?   Ask yourself if 90,000 left one day, how would that feel?  The crowd is very fickle and can turn against you.

 

This attachment makes me vulnerable to external forces, a path to suffering and anxiety.

 

Following this unworthy dialogue backwards, it is a perceived need that leads me to suffer. My “Ego” has felt unworthy, not good enough, almost shameful when PTSD is active. My “Ego” feels threatened as an adolescent at times.


When I meditate and examine this dilemma, approval or criticism is external. Also criticism or approval can change outside my influence. My life suffers when I buy into this belief. It is a mirage!


I am aware when my “Ego” feels insulted or damaged. He wants to retaliate against a perceived threat. He thinks retaliation can change my unworthiness.

 

It is such a subconscious, complex mechanism from childhood abuse. Life activates this difficulty from time to time.


I thought healing, emptying my amygdala of all the stored trauma would last forever. Now I know somethings will always be below the surface, capable of bringing that hell back into my life.

 

Knowing approval, respect or criticism has nothing to do with my wellbeing does not quell its massive need to protect itself.


I have learned to be intensely aware of my “Egos” need to be resentful, childish, reactive and destructive.

 

For some of us, a constant vigil of awareness is needed.
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Combining Two Effective Therapies To Help Codependents

I find this insightful and helpful on my journey.

Dr Nicholas Jenner

Codependency is a complex issue and many therapists doubt its existence. They might agree somewhat with the classic definition of codependency where an enabling partner helps an addict maintain his addiction but the idea of codependency in relationships, the love addiction, is disputed. However, codependency in relationships is something I see and work with every day in my practice and I am convinced it is a concept that affects many relationships.

Once this is established, the question is, what can be done about it? How do you unravel the roots of codependency and the enmeshment with another person? Where do you start to deal with thoughts and feelings first established in childhood? How do you break the cycle of sacrifice and enabling? There are, of course, many approaches aimed at dealing with codependency and its effects and therapists and organisations have their favourites. I have dealt with codependents for years…

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My goal meditating: a mind focused and empty of thought


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My goal is to build focus on the breath, strong enough, so thoughts clear and my mind is empty. An exploration of my inner world is possible from this space.


If my mind is filled with thoughts, I am not meditating, more like thought daydreaming.


When I first started a mindfulness practice, thoughts filled my sets. It took time, dedication and a daily practice to reach no-thought.


It took a very specific, intense focus to let my thoughts clear.


This is the challenge to train the mind,  slowing it down and emptying itself of thought.


I will always have some of the reported 60,000 thoughts that cross my path daily.

 

My goal is not perfection, or the elimination of thought.

 

My goal is to establish a silent space, focused and secure, available when things go sideways.

 

Once an empty mind is reached, work on many issues and applications can commence.


All the magic happens when my mind is focused, empty of thought.

 

It takes practice and dedication to reach empty.

 

It is extremely simple but very difficult for most people.
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updated: never give up is contagious

An old post and video that I watch from time to time.

This kid opens me up to reaching a little farther, risking a little more, searching a little beyond my limits.  How he lives his life amazes me.   Happiness exists in the strangest places is all I see.  It exists in small areas where you think suffering and resentment would thrive.  It thrives in everyone he touches.

Amelia Earhart: the process is its own reward.”

 

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“The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward.”

– Amelia Earhart
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My two cents: From a distance, it seems she lived her life full-out.


“The process is its own reward”: Life is a journey, taking action is the goal, it is the reward, results are fleeting.

 

The goal is to limit our attachments to possessions, titles, power, and trophies.

 

Some Buddhists give up all worldly possessions and their attachments to them.

 

Maybe we could try to bring more perspective to our attachments.
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