Posts Tagged ‘C-PTSD’

Polish yourself, let go the garbage, empty the crap from the back of the pick up

image
Miles Pilling: http://mindfulphotos.org
*
*
*
Embrace Setbacks
.
“If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?”
*
Rumi
*
*
*
*
Life presents enormous challenges for each one of us. Rich, poor, middle class, royalty or servant, life brings a myriad of personal hardships.
*
*
The hardships are as varied as our uniqueness, however even iconic figures laden with life’s riches and accolades (Robin Williams, Phillip Seymour Hoffman) commit suicide.
*
*
Redefine your hardships, drop all judgments and see them as part of the journey of life.
*
*
Life does not have an attitude, a vendetta against us. No, bad luck, is not the answer either or excuse.
*
*
Each one of us starts with different capabilities and we begin from much different places.
*
*
Gratitude can not exist in an environment filled with doubt, worry, resentment and fear.
*
*
Loosen the grip on goals, the much needed success at all costs, we must win or suffer mentality.
*
*
If we must have a goal, make it to give all our effort everyday.
*
*
Let go the need to judge, to narrate life and live it fully.
*
*
*

Emotions: lets play with some of our emotions today.

  

*
*
*

Bring awareness to any emotion that you experience today.
*
*
Ask,yourself if any thought surrounds each emotion.
*
*
I am betting judgments and thoughts proliferate any emotion felt.
*
*
When a strong emotion arrives, can you let the storyline go and breathe into the body sensation.
*
*
When an emotion arrives, does it fade quickly when we ignore it?
*
*
Can you experience the opposite emotion that your feeling.
*
*
Sad to happy, joyful to angry or euphoric to depressed.
*
*
Notice how fleeting, ephemeral and transient emotions are!
*
*
*

Emotions: Do you believe emotions are connected to happiness?

  

Some emotions are attached to the 60,000 thoughts that bombard us everyday. With a thought arriving each second, the vast majority are ignored or overlooked.

Consider that emotions are impermanent, fleeting, they arrive in our consciousness, stay a while, then fade helplessly away.

Happiness, real happiness is so much deeper, enduring, longer lasting than any emotion.

No emotion can describe me because five minutes later, my description would be different.

I can be happy with all kinds of different emotions present.

Happiness is not dependent on any one emotion or all of them combined.

We all have the same number of emotions.

With the same emotions available, some people suffer while others enjoy happiness.

Emotions must not have influence on happiness then.

Opinions?

*
*
*

Approval: some believe it is a salve that cures all, unfortunately!

  

*
*
*
Look at the time we spend chasing approval or avoiding criticism (disapproval).
*
*
We men covet the prettiest wife, women, the most handsome man.
*
*
Do we not desire to have others envy us, our mate, our house, our possessions, career, accomplishments, victories.
*
*
Do we not make trophy rooms to display who we are, what we have accomplished?
*
*
Having others approval is as abstract as air and subject to change at any moment. Can you touch this approval?
*
*
In a time of need, do you think this approval will rescue you, protect you, save you?
*
*
So does approval bring happiness?
*
*
As hard as we try to gain approval (happiness), criticism must bring sadness and suffering.
*
*
Wrong again. Approval or disapproval are external and have nothing to do with who we are or happiness.
*
*
Life is not about gaining anyone’s approval.
*
*
Happiness is still an inside job. Approval is not needed.
*
*
*

Empathy

  
*
*
*
Bouncing Back: Linda Graham;
*
*
“WHILE MINDFULNESS and observation-reflection create the self-awareness and expanded brain capacities that allow us to create the changes in our behaviors critical to resilience, the other essential catalyst for brain change — empathy — requires skillfully interacting with other people to generate the connection and self-acceptance we also need for resilience.
*
*
Chapter 1 shows that the early learning of resilient coping strategies and the development of the prefrontal cortex itself rely on the empathy developed through experiences of secure attachment.
*
*
Research shows that five elements of that empathy are essential for maturing the prefrontal cortex in the first place and for continuing to strengthen it throughout our lives:
*
*
1. Resonance: picking up the “vibe” of other people
*
*
2. Attunement: feeling your way into another person’s experience and “feeling felt” by them
*
*
3. Empathy (as one part of the larger umbrella of empathy): making sense of your experience or another’s, conveying a shared understanding of the meaning of the experience, and sensing that any experience is completely understood and accepted
*
*
4. Compassion: literally “feeling with,” keeping the heart open and caring in the face of struggle or suffering
*
*
5. Acceptance: coming to terms with what is or has been, so that you can cope going forward”
*
*
*

Fear: Jade The Mystic; Real love Is free

  
*
*
*
Fear
*
*
doesn’t protect
*
*
you from death;
*
*
it protects you
*
*
from life.
*
*
*
Fear is a by-product of your own desires that the mind created.
*
*
Many people try to fight against darkness like fear.
*
*
However, the more you fight, the more you lose.
*
*
You cannot win against a thing that has never existed.
*
*
The thought of desire creating fear has never been real.
*
*
You fear that you may not get what you want and get what you don’t want.
*
*
Deprivation and anticipation will drive you crazy.”
*
*
*

Dopamine: what we receive fulfilling desire, experienced as satisfaction, temporary though, fleeting!

*
*
Linda Graham: “Bouncing Back”
*
*
“Dopamine is the neurotransmitter of pleasure and reward.
*
*
With the release of dopamine in the brain stem we feel good, we feel alive and energized, and we want more.
*
*
Dopamine is actually partly responsible for the way we get into ruts, doing what makes us feel comfortable, getting better at what we’ve always been good at.
*
*
The neurochemical reward we get from repeating successful patterns of behavior can hold us back from trying new strategies, from discovering new ways of being and coping.
*
*
The release of dopamine can lead to addictive behaviors, too: wanting more of what made us feel good before, even if it’s not good for us.
*
*
Maybe shopping makes us feel happier, so we run up charges on our credit card until our debt is out of control, or we try to relieve our stress with too much social drinking.
*
*
Mindfulness is the key here — awareness that always involves discernment of the wholesome from the unwholesome and the effect of our choices on our resilience.
*
*
Dopamine operates on the basis of expectation.
*
*
When the brain experiences what it expects to experience — when we turn on the kitchen faucet and water comes out — dopamine levels stay steady.
*
*
If something unexpected happens — we turn on the faucet and no water comes out — the expectation is disrupted.
*
*
The disruption switches off the dopamine and generates a slight unease in the body.
*
*
A mistake has been detected.
*
*
The brain directs us to stop moving forward until we know things are okay.”
*
*
*

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 715 other followers

%d bloggers like this: