From Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation:
Complex PTSD consists of of six symptom clusters, which also have been described in terms of dissociation of personality. Of course, people who receive this diagnosis often also suffer from other problems as well, and as noted earlier, diagnostic categories may overlap significantly. The symptom clusters are as follows:
Alterations in Regulation of Affect ( Emotion ) and Impulses
Changes in Relationship with others
Somatic Symptoms
Changes in Meaning
Changes in the perception of Self
Changes in Attention and Consciousness
Alterations in regulation of affect(emotion) an impulse:
Almost all People who are seriously traumatized have problems in tolerating and regulating their emotions and surges or impulses. However, those with complex PTSD and dissociative disorders tend to have more difficulties than those with PTSD because disruptions in early development have inhibited their ability to regulate themselves.
the fact that you have a dissociative organization of your personality makes you highly vulnerable to rapid and unexpected changes in emotions and sudden impulses. Various parts of the personality intrude on each other either through passive influence or switching when your under stress, resulting in dysregulation. Merely having an emotion, such as anger , may evoke other parts of you to feel fear or shame, and to engage in impulsive behaviors to stop avoid the feelings.
Changes in Attention and Consciousness:
People with Complex PTSD suffer from more severe and frequent dissociation symptoms, as well as memory and attention problems, than those with simple PTSD. In addition to amnesty due to the activity of various parts of the self, people may experience difficulties with concentration, attention, other memory problems and general spaciness. These symptoms often accompany dissociation of the personality, but they are also common in people who do not have dissociative disorders. For example everyone can be spacey, absorbed in an activity, or miss an exit on the highway. When various parts of the personality are are active, by definition, a person experiences some kind of abrupt change in attention and consciousness.
Changes in the Perception of Self:
People who have been traumatized in childhood are often troubled by guilt, shame, and negative feelings about themselves, such as the belief they are unlikable, unlovable, stupid, inept, dirty, worthless, lazy, and so forth. In Complex Dissociative disorders there are typically particular parts that contain these negative feelings about the self while other parts may evaluate themselves quite differently. Alterations among parts thus may result in rather rapid and distinct changes in self perception.
Changes in Relationship with others:
It is especially hard to trust other people if you have been repeatedly abused, abandoned or betrayed as a child. Mistrust makes it very difficult to make friends, and to be able to distinguish between good and bad intentions in other people. Some parts do not seem to trust anyone, while other parts may be so vulnerable and needy that they do not pay attention to clues that perhaps a person is not trustworthy. Some parts like to be close to others or feel a desperate need to be close and taken care of, while other parts fear being close or actively dislike people. Some parts are afraid of being in relationships while others are afraid of being rejected or criticized. This naturally sets up major internal as well as relational conflicts.
Somatic Symptoms:
People with Complex PTSD often have medical unexplained physical symptoms such as abdominal pains, headaches, joint and muscle pain, stomach problems, and elimination problems. These people are sometimes most unfortunately mislabeled as hypochondriacs or as exaggerating their physical problems. But these problems are real, even though they may not be related to a specific physical diagnosis. Some dissociative parts are stuck in the past experiences that involved pain may intrude such that a person experiences unexplained pain or other physical symptoms. And more generally, chronic stress affects the body in all kinds of ways, just as it does the mind. In fact, the mind and body cannot be separated. Unfortunately, the connection between current physical symptoms and past traumatizing events is not always so clear to either the individual or the physician, at least for a while. At the same time we know that people who have suffered from serious medical,problems. It is therefore very important that you have physical problems checked out, to make sure you do not have a problem form which you need medical help.”
Changes in Meaning:
Finally, chronically traumatized people lose faith that good things can happen and people can be kind and trustworthy. They feel hopeless, often believing that the future will be as bad as the past, or that they will not live long enough to experience a good future. People who have a dissociative disorder may have different meanings in various dissociative parts. Some parts may be relatively balanced in their worldview, others may be despairing, believing the world to be a completely negative, dangerous place, while other parts might maintain an unrealistic optimistic outlook on life
Posted by kaitlots on December 6, 2011 at 8:14 pm
OK so I relate to I think 100% of this, especially the somatic, which I am battling as I type this.
All of this just made me feel incredibly anxious.
Can this really all be helped with mindfulness? It feels overwhelming, scary, feel alone…
Posted by Marty on December 6, 2011 at 9:02 pm
ok, relax and follow the breath, as the ego wants this to be confusing for you. Again all you need to do is follow the breath on the breath model intently everyday and as you catch each negative thought.
The rest will take care of itself and be brought forth at the appropriate time.
The ego will try to confuse, scare, manipulate anything to get you to think so it directs or controls our direction and happiness.
Resist this as delusion as it is, I came out of my garage shaking in terror with a nervous system that had exploded and I am extremely happy, present.
I have sat quietly with intent awareness as my demons, ghosts and terror thoughts paraded before me. I learned all these gyrations were just my own body mechanisms and frivolous conjecture loaded with huge amounts of cortisol.
It will fade if you keep,out of thought and take that 110% effort daily.
Nothing can stop,you but your own mind.
Posted by Marty on December 6, 2011 at 9:09 pm
It is okay to be uncomfortable or anxious and not connect it to anything, it will change if you do not judge it. Great time to bring out the breathing model to practice short rounds of inhales and exhales. opportunity exist in every anxious thought that arrives before you. V
Watch the sensations of the body that come with this emotion. Know where it settles, if it has a shape or color. Get to know where your anxious feeling are kept. relax this is your own defense mechanism just out of whack for a while. We are retiring it as we ride the breathing model. Healing is not always easy or pleasant but freedom is euphoric after a life of PTSD
Posted by kaitlots on December 6, 2011 at 9:24 pm
Thanks Marty. I will practice breathing and try to accept these feelings and not react.
Posted by NaNa on February 23, 2013 at 10:44 am
I totally agree with all the fatrocs you have explained so well that lead to DID. As I was reading The Comfort Factor-I suddenly remembered rocking back and forth as a child and patting myself on the back while saying I love you carla, you’re a good girl. It’s okay-your a good girl. I did this because I needed comfort so badly that I had to give it to myself as there was no one else to give it to me at that time. This was not a bad memory for me as I am just starting to recover some of my childhood memories after years of denial and am grateful for each one I remember. This is the new way I am comforting myself-letting the memories return and accepting them. Thanks for helping this process along through your writings.
Posted by Suffering Anonymously on March 8, 2013 at 7:42 pm
Before I go further? I think a great deal of information you have here is helpful.
However? Once I got to your replies? I knew that breathing into a brown paper bag was likely in my future.
Your remark resembling “You have to make 110% effort every day” absolutely terrified me. Giving 110% so far is all I’ve ever done and it hasn’t gotten me anywhere but to develop C-PTSD thanks to a lifetime of either/or chronic abuse and/or chronic tragedies. Why would I ever think that MORE 110% effort would yield me anything other than what has transpired already? That’s way too high a target to suggest willy-nilly to anyone with C-PTSD and you should know better.
.
“Nothing can stop you but your own mind” OMG!!! This sounds exactly like something my parents used to chide me with when they wished to diminish or humiliate rather than ever concern themselves with parenting me with anything I needed. A perfectly clueless thing to say to anyone with C-PTSD; another alarming trigger for me to read and now I’m getting pissed…
IMHO? The minute you read Kaitlots post: “All of this just made me feel incredibly anxious.”? Your one and only response to her should have been, “Then get off this site right away before you compound that triggering into a full-blown panic attack. Don’t come back until you really feel you are ready.”
I think you are a bit impressed with yourself and need to get over it. One size does not fit all and I’m afraid your personal-path, preachy, lousy advice is likely to cause far greater harm than healing.
I think I’ll take my own advice now and get as far away from here as I can before more damage is done.
Posted by Marty on March 8, 2013 at 7:55 pm
Suffering anonymously.
I love you get on anonymously and insult. To chicken to open a dialogue. Afraid.
I bet. You can insult under that large rock. How pitiful an effort. Are you my ex wife an enemy? Why not get your blog and open it up for people like you to anonymously attack. Be brave. Suffering one.
Well you came you read, then you judged. 110%. You do not have to worry, you find fault with others and never take responsibility.
There are over 1600 posts and many many responses and resources and you come on here, judge and insult me, over one post. Nice
If you had tried to,do anything, I would be nice, but what is the use, you are not suffering anonymously you puked it in others, this blog and me.
Nice who have you fooled today. Words are useless try action and effort.
Posted by jennifertemp on March 8, 2013 at 8:54 pm
You ‘anoymous” are correct. This website is not for you because you do not understand that Marty does not profess to be a therapist. He merely shares his experience and history to reach mindfulness and the power it has to heal. He shares through years of study.
The type of anger you display shows you truly do need professional help and are a very disturbed person. If you thinks this website is damaging, you have serious problems. This type of negativity has no place on website which is here to help and heal.
Good luck wallowing in your self pity – your cortisol levels must be off the charts.
Posted by kaitlots on March 8, 2013 at 11:01 pm
I have come a long way, nothing short of a miracle, and I owe all of it to this site and Marty.
Facing PTSD, and not running from it was indeed one of the scariest times of my life, and probably why many others do not get through to the other side; but it’s the only way (IMO). Once I was able to sit with the anxiety for the first time in my life, the healing began. I cannot even begin to describe where I am now. I have never been in a better place.
I still practice breathing and mindfulness every day, and it is now very fulfilling and rewarding. Enjoying each moment…
Dissociation symptoms can be terrifying! Feeling like your broken! But it is only a symptom. And seeing that symptom allowed me to get to the cause. Finally…Childhood PTSD.
I feel I have tried every therapy, book, CBT, medication, class/workshop known to man before finding this life changing site, and I owe my entire well-being to it.
There may not be a ‘one size fits all cure’ but this worked for me. I have also brought some of your suggestions to friends of mine, and have also seen remarkable changes in their lives.
And Marty, re-reading your reply over a year later was absolutely what I needed to hear then! Your non-BS, clean cut, straight-forwardness is perfect.
My ego DID try to scare me, trying not to let me face this. And there were days were all I could do was breath….follow breath. I was physically debilitated with fear, for days at a time.
Suffering Anonymously – I hope you too can heal and find peace, don’t listen to your ego and its fear/grip. If I can heal, anyone can!
Posted by Holly on April 6, 2013 at 6:56 am
I have cptsd- I am 41 year old female who I would think that by now would be able to have at least one relationship where I don’t end up feeling like my entire life is like a game of clue(not knowing who’s who). even after every form of abuse on a continuous basic since I was to young to remember, I have only two friends and it seems like no matter how bad someone is or has treated me I cant help but find something good about that person or I tend to ask myself what has happened to them to be able to have done this to me almost as a way of justifying the people who have continualy hurt me. I do take corrective critasizem well to help me grow!!