Chronic pain is such a private matter, that no one else can feel. My wife is oblivious with my statement to her that “I hurt.” She has no reference point and has lived with me like this for a decade.
Although people may care, they cannot fully understand how much pain or what it’s like to cope if they don’t experience it.
As a former professional athlete, I had to learn to cope with pain. The violent childhood I endured also prepared me to cope with chronic pain.
I joined a chronic pain group and managed to stick around for a year. I learned about break-through pain and ways to calm down. Eventually I realized that the group was counter-productive with all of the oppression olympics going on. “How bad was your week?” or “Can you top this misery?” seemed to just keep us all chasing our tails.
I don’t want to fear my pain.
Posted by Rick Appleton on February 8, 2011 at 3:17 pm
Everything in this article is true! I personally witnessed Marty go through this. My name is Rick and I was in the same pain management group when I met Marty and he can a test to the fact that I was close to death! A lot closer then I am today. Let me explain…
I have had 5 back surgery’s. I have a Med. Pump implanted in me which was maxed out feeding me Dilotded 24 hours a day and a spinal cord stimulator implanted in me and at the time I was taking Morphine,Percocet pulse Soma nothing helped the pain! I wanted to die! I thought my life was over. I was only 34 when I got hurt at work and after 8 years of uncertainty and the thought of not being able to provide for my family I was at my end! I met Marty in my pain management group and I saw someone who had a way out! I started to walk more and stop felling sorry for myself and realized there is more to life and I cant give up! Now I’m 51 years old, Marty and I still keep in touch even though I live in TX. now. I visit with him every time I get back home. I am now doing some Acting in films and enjoying life with out all the drugs.
Thanks Marty
Rick
Posted by 12wanderer on February 9, 2011 at 1:09 am
Thanks Rick. I am amazed at what you have accomplished and how far it is possible to reach. Happiness does have a geographical spot, it exists inside and your attitude. The mind is plastic and can grow and build new neural connections. Also left and right mid frontal cortex’s of the brain can link and grow the actual physical connection.
Again, Rick you have come far and found a life beyond what you expected possible. It starts with a step and trying. It is how you finish. All we have to do is try and that is a little part of happiness right there. May take a while to look back and know that but trying changes us.
Try it. haha
Posted by Jennifer on October 4, 2012 at 3:11 pm
Just read this for the first time today – feeling very overwhelmed at the lack of understanding of people, especially when it is someone you care for so much – I don’t get it what is wrong with people (actually I do more and more). This so gives me an even better understanding of things and your great commitment and strength, resiliance to pursue the life you deserve. Don’t close any doors.
Would love it if you would do a blog on “Rejection”.
Posted by sharpword on April 15, 2013 at 3:36 am
Hi Marty I’m Hubert. I just read your post here I fully identify with you and Rick i have had Chronic Fibromyalgia since age 8.. I too was raised in a mean and often violent home,certainly violent towards myself… Not to go on at all here. I have posted several blog posts regarding rejection and invisibility on my site ‘sharpword’ you are all welcome to visit, predominately my blog is about faith in Jesus Christ he alone has been my stay and comfort throughout the torturous last 8 years. The reason I responded to your post though is to offer something else I found to help with Chronic pain and sleeplessness, It’s called Binaural Beats, If you chose to try them they are harmless but you need headphones and a quiet place to listen, just before bed.
Y/T Hu