A concept that crossed my path recently is the notion our emotions are damaged!
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Hogwash!!!!!
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Emotions are impermanent and not who we are. As I have posted many times in the past, ride the breathing track and let emotions flow on through and fade.
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Focus on the breath, empty of thought and see emotions are working fine and can not be damaged.
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I can let every emotion fade with my being present without judgment about anything. I am present in the world without my emotions being used. How can they be damaged then?
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Let us try to not identify with our emotions and understand that they have nothing to do with who we are. Most trauma emotions are past tense, negative and cognitively driven by our own ego.
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Let them pass by, heal!
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Posted by firesurvivors on May 29, 2012 at 1:12 am
When an emotion or thought comes to mind I want to let it overwhelm me, perhaps this is the PTSD in me or maybe the artist. I allow it to consume me to the point where I feel sick. The hardest part is using the logic part of my brain and saying, “No, just breathe and ride it out”
One of the hardest parts of riding it out is the fact that I rely on emotions for creating art. Without emotions, what do I have? An empty canvas with nothing that others can respond to or critique. However, I do believe that sometimes we can create out of pain, a truly introspective piece about how we feel. On the contrary, more times than not, my best thinking is when I am in the right state of mind, where my emotions are present, but I am not letting them consume me.
Posted by Marty on May 29, 2012 at 2:05 am
maybe letting emotion flow on through we can truly see emotion as they are in reality.
Some of the most inspirational people have learned to empty the mind, give intention and trust. Not engaging emotions has let my mind create at a million times the normal rate.
Emotions are impermanent and constantly arriving, intensifying then departing. Not being tied to them has frree my spirit and being empty opens up the right hemisphere where creativity lives.
Now let us speak of trauma emotions, if we let them overwhelm us we are filled with cortisol and lost. We heal by letting the story and feelings fear, anger, anxiety flow on by and observe the body sensations. creativity comes out when our judgments, worry, doubt and fear are let go,of.
WE heal by staying present and observing our inner world. What you think is emotion, being overwhelmed is a ego or cognitive driven and not real emotion.
The fear and trauma are not real. Remember that we create the ego. Our emotions are tied to this identity our ego we create.
Let the emotion go and ego remain dormant for a while.
Letting go will free your creative juices. Rick Hanson says we have one with a million zeroes behind it for opportunity. Open up and let real creativity escape the cognitive prison.
Sounds like a change of creating over happiness and calm would be a change. I have 1200 posts in a year and a half. Staggering to think I would have to accomplish this.
Meditating everyday giving intention to understand more and more about the breath and it’s connections has filled my mind with so much. I create no boundaries or expectations I am here empty of thought and the possibilities skyrocket for us. our brains were meant to be focused and empty at times. The difference between a traffic jam and a clean freeway.
My mind focused on the breath empty of thought can operate at levels thought impossible to me.
The ego wants to tie you to your cognitive side and grab emotions as needed. Not grabbing emotions is where you will find the true creative you. Hope you give this a try.
Posted by Marty on May 29, 2012 at 2:32 am
Being overwhelmed, is it possible. Oh you bet. We who have PTSD dissociate into the past or worry about the future and in this space being overwhelmed is an early destination. Avoidance and agoraphobia are down the road a bit.
if you are present here and now, without control, surrendering to the desire to control frees us.
What does the body sensations feel like when a feeling overwhelms you. leave the story behind the emotion and see where anger, anxiety and fear settle. get to know your emotion without the ego involved and maybe creative juices will by multiplied by a thousand or more.
Know how an emotion works, arrives, stays a while, then leaves, replaced by another.
if you wake up with a nasty mood, anxious, fearful and agitated, what do you do?
Do you accept this as fact or let it flow and choose a mellow open happy, manner for today.
There is a choice and a freedom that creativity flows from our core outward. So much more out there that the ego offers you fear of losing what you have inside already.
You can be healed and creative right now, it is already complete inside you. The coping mechanisms and the control we think we have keeps us safe. That is fallacy.
You have been making a decision for a long time to fuel your trauma with thought.
Realize that and it is just as big a decision as deciding not to engage emotions or triggers. if one is not working then I would try the other way.
Posted by firesurvivors on May 30, 2012 at 1:12 am
Thank you for your great tips! In the past I have used my emotions in a positive way to create, but ever since the fire I have found that I don’t let go of what I need to. My artwork suffers because I am unwillingly to just accept my emotions as they are and breathe threw them. I have to make a conscious effort to just accept them as they are and let them pass.
Posted by Marty on May 30, 2012 at 1:33 am
That effort becomes much much easier if you develop your focus with the breathing track. You probably have a strong visual sense, so see the model with a your creative eyes. notice the flow of the breath and the model. Vases how the change from inhale to the transition kind of flows. I found actually watching and trace my breath let me feel my breath in a different space. it had momentum, flow and change of direction.
let themthoughtnof meditation be for a while. Start thinking about using your intuition for a while. instead of judging things let go and intuitively feel what is happening.
Ride the breathing track. Sounds like you have been dissociating almost to the point that it becomes a continuos loop. this is dumping cortisol and increasing your sensitivity to more release of cortisol. try not to think even if you have to trace the breathing track on your thigh until the story fades. This will help clear your system of cortisol.
Try exercising, aerobic to exhaustion will bring achievement to the mind and dissipate cortisol also.
print the affirmations and recite them aloud into your home phone to your cell. record and listen. No negative self talk. Only raving accolades about you. this programs the left computer brain. it works and these two skills will help change our negative self image.
Be aware of time spent thinking. Good luck!
Posted by The Art of Letting Go « Fire Survivors on May 30, 2012 at 2:06 am
[...] end, I am just inviting more pain in my mind, with no chance of happiness. Marty from the blog, C-PTSD has reminded me that me that I need to accept my emotions, breathe through them, and not allow my [...]