Paris-Street-small by Gustave Caillebotte
You could have exposed me to the greatest people on earth, flew me to exotic places, fed me luxurious meals and my PTSD would still numb me with misery
I was not capable of appreciating anything especially, me!
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My ego convinced me that my life was miserable. How could a childhood be changed, now, to fix me?
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All these negative, invisible walls, buried even the hope of being happy!
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In reality, nothing but air and my own mind, stood in the way of happiness.
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It can be a matter of timing, working to stay in this moment or getting lured into the storyline of past thought.
Posted by kaitlots on January 23, 2012 at 5:16 pm
Another thing I try to remember with this, is we’re not used to being happy,or think we are allowed. It’s like I have to get used to not worrying, it’s a whole new world.
Affirmations and being present are habits I want to build on.
Posted by Marty on January 23, 2012 at 6:46 pm
When I healed, waking up in the morning in the shower was strange without that negative tape of self worthlessness playing. It was a learning process to not have the baggage of trauma from childhood clouding the opportunity and thrill of life.
Yes the thrill of life is tremendous. We exert our effort then relax, results are judgments and that we gave up so we could be happy. remember!